Wolfing down New Yorkers' pets

Wish I'd said that!

[Reprinted from Issues & Views January 5, 2004]

Radical environmentalist nutcakes are responsible for the re-introduction of wolves into various parts of the country. These green missionaries abide by the myths about wolves, that is, wolves never attack humans and wolves never stray from their assigned territory. In spite of the fact that in areas of reintroduction, wolves are causing pain and hardship to those who are forced to cope with the animal's reality, as opposed to its myths, the greens persist in their attempts to return all land to wilderness, especially in the rural West.

Since so many of these radical green notions originate among an eastern elite, Henry Lamb has a proposal. How about reintroducing wolves into New York City's Central Park? Here is a bit of his humor, from "The case for wolves -- in Central Park," The Eco-logic Powerhouse magazine (December 2003):

After years of intense study, a western-based environmental equity organization is advancing a bold new proposal to reintroduce wolves into New York's Central Park. "There's no reason why New Yorkers should not enjoy these magnificent creatures; after all, if there is to be environmental equity, we should do all we can to spread the joy wolves bring to the people who are most deprived," said a spokesman for the group.

According to a recent study, the benefits of wolf reintroduction into the park far outweigh the negatives. "About the only negative we could come up with, is that the wolves would have to be taken from the West, which means that wildlife officials would have to find new ways to decimate the cattle and sheep these wolves would no longer be able to slaughter," the spokesman said.

On the plus side, Wolves in Central Park would have no cattle to eat, so they would be very effective in controlling the dog and cat populations. In no time at all, the city could repeal its "pooper-scooper" laws. Even though it is widely known that wolves never attack humans, and never stray from their assigned wilderness area, there would likely be a noticeable decrease in other nocturnal predators in the area. Drug dealers, prostitutes, muggers and the like, could find the wolves to be a challenge.

-- Henry Lamb is Executive VP of the Environmental Conservation Organization and Chairman of Sovereignty International.

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